The Hour of Bliss - Newly Engaged

The Hour of Engagement Bliss

You’ve dreamed of this day. You’ve finally met your prince and are ready to tie the knot. Before the engagement becomes official you start to notice things more. Wedding magazines are everywhere. Engagement rings on the fingers of everyone from the cashier at the grocery store to the display rings at the local jeweler scream out to you, “Soon I could be yours.” Everyone you know is engaged, just married or getting serious with a potential mate. Marriage is in the air and weddings are on your brain.

Then it happens.
He pops the question.

OH MY GOD—you are ENGAGED! It’s real and your hands are shaking to prove it. You have the ring. Your heart is soaring, your mind is on overdrive and you’ve never felt more alive. It is official. You are on the path to becoming a married woman.
Depending on where the proposal happens, it could be an hour or the next day when you start to share the exciting news. Once the “I can’t believe we’re engaged!” emotion wears off a tiny bit, you look at each other and try to figure out who to tell, and in what order—first, second, third, and so on.

With this sharing, the “Hour of Bliss” comes to an end. Sharing the news means you’re now inviting others into what was a private dating relationship. Sharing means you’ve just made in-laws out of your parents and siblings. The roller coaster ride of getting married now commences.

Nobody really prepares you for this part of the proposal, but here is where the first test of your marriage begins. We believe that the moment you get engaged, your marriage starts.

You now have a monumental tasks ahead of you, should you chose to accept it: bringing together the main people in your life based on your values around marriage, family, friendships, and community, to a wedding day that you will spend roughly a year planning. You will make hundreds, perhaps thousands, of decisions to create the day when you cross the legal threshold from single to married.

It’s no longer about you and your boyfriend hanging out and having fun. The hour of blissful engagement has ended and the real tasks of married life begin as you navigate who you are, what you want, who are your supporting cast members, and how you can work as a team to accomplish one of the most, if not THE most interpersonally complex events of your life.

- Elizabeth Doherty Thomas, is a co-founder of The First Dance, along with Marriage and Family therapist father Dr. William J. Doherty. The First Dance was a Modern Bride Trendsetter award winner in 2007 for taking on the complex family dynamics of wedding planning. Read Take Back Your Wedding: Managing the People Stress of Wedding Planning for more advice on working through the people stresses of wedding planning as a couple, with your families, and how to strengthen your upcoming marriage through this enormous first task of married life.

The Hour of Engagement Bliss

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